​Is your Social Media Feed Killing You?

Ok, there’s your Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn, Snapchat, to get through, let alone your Messenger, WhatsApp and regular texts to read and respond to! It takes dedication (and a helluva lot of time!) to keep up with the constant flow of ‘information’ about the hundreds of people you know and follow and check if they are noticing, liking and following you back!.

If you are really honest, there is every likelihood that you are spending much longer each day connected to your social media feed than you would prefer.
 
So how do you change that?
 
We are social beings - herd animals, if you like!
Humans need connection to feel secure. You might argue that watching what is happening in your friends’ lives is a type of connection. But it is removed and voyeuristic, actually creating a sense of missing out and aloneness.
 
In Psychology Today, Amy Morin, says “Of course, it would seem logical to assume that people use Facebook because it somehow enhances their lives. But oddly, research suggests the opposite. Studies show Facebook use is associated with lower life satisfaction... envying your friends on Facebook leads to depression."

If you are feeling frustrated by the way your addiction to your social media feed is shrinking your enjoyment of life, here are some ways to develop strategies:

• Create “sacred space” around some activities, where NO online connecting is allowed: think family meals, parent-kid time, nature walks, and bedtime. Just enjoy what you are doing – and who you’re doing it with! 
• Don’t always take your phone when you go out. Ok, the group might need one phone for emergencies, but does everyone really need one?
• Use Delaying tactics: Like the smoker who is dealing with cravings, you can practice delaying tactics to manage your screen time. Remind yourself that you can check it later, do something else right now (if you must stay on your phone, maybe dial up a Meditation App like Stop, Breathe & Think and spend 10 minutes practicing being present in your own life). 
• Leave screens outside the bedroom. Using an alarm clock instead of your phone means you will resist checking your feed as soon as you wake up. 
• Give yourself permission to walk away from, or even suspend, your            social media accounts (make sure your friends know how to contact you).
• Go to a connectivity-free zone to recharge (the bush, a way-out farm, mountain retreat, etc.) 
• Create a regular Connectivity-Free time with the family – think about charades, drag out the board games, or light some candles and make dinner a ‘just because’ celebration. 
• When you do decide to check out other peoples’ lives, limit the time to 30 minutes by setting an alarm on your phone.
• Reward yourself: Ah yes, the best part! The benefit from having extra time in your day is all about treating yourself well. Re-engage with other things you’d like to do.  Is an early morning walk something you’d like to fit into your day? Can you pop over to a friend’s house for a cuppa or catch up after work one afternoon? If you notice you never get to read a book any more, have a bath instead of a shower and take a book in there with you. Be spontaneous! Go biking, kayaking, rollerblading, or swimming.

 
When you make any of these changes, check in with your own happiness and engagement with your experience of life. Acknowledge any improvement you feel by disconnecting from the relentless social media feed that was previously eating up your life.
 
Be kind to yourself. If you slip up and find your thumbs flicking through the relentless feeds, close it down, congratulate yourself for noticing, forgive yourself and re-commit to your goal.
 
The moment you do, you'll get the time back to be involved in your own version of life, rather than somebody else’s.
 

 
 Let me know your thoughts...

Vanessa 
​0414 99 66 13
ThoughtMatters